The Ten Greatest Tweets of Strategic Tape Reserve

Everyone in the fast and competitive world that is the ‘music industry’ knows it’s not what you make, but how you present your #brandidentity. While the legendary and historic German cassette disseminator Strategic Tape Reserve is a home to such groundbreaking auditory superstars such as VLK, Emerging Industries of Wuppertal, moduS ponY, HAWN, The Blank Holidays, and Whettman Chelmets, none of this would matter even a little bit if STR’s Twitter game wasn’t, as the centennials say, “on fleek”. Fortunately, fleek is Strategic Tape Reserve’s middle name (despite the common misconception that it’s ‘Tape’), and so we present the objectively correct list of STR’s ten greatest tweets.

Do not @.


1. Flattered

The STR gently turns down an appreciated but unacceptable invitation.


2. Unrealized Postential

The STR laments the post not living up to their potential.


3. Ferric Heat

With their state-of-the-art German time machine, the STR give us a glimpse into the cinema of the future.


4. Strategic Tapir Reserve

Any captain of industry knows that a backup plan is important. Here, STR demonstrate their boundless wisdom and ingenuity in explaining what a potential re-brand might look like, just in case the seemingly rock solid tape economy collapses.


5. Authoritarian Tastemaking

Another bit of brilliant business insight, STR re-examines the best way to coerce the brainless masses into purchasing auditory content.


6. Hyphens Matter

Sidestepping a potential PR nightmare, STR clarify that their operation is small, not the cassettes themselves.


7. SubmitHub is for Masochists

STR, in service to the community of independent artists, advises research into SubmitHub before giving uninformed consent.


8. Freedoms of Ownership

STR breaks down the many benefits of purchasing music vs. streaming.


9. Nordic-Walking

The STR share their vision in service of the under-served market of Nordic-Walkers who also enjoy listening to sounds with their revolutionary compilation These Carbon-Composite Poles Are Made For Walkin’.


10. Hearts of Gold

In a classy move, the STR pay homage to the Lads of Liverpool and the inventors of music with Suko Pyramid and moduS ponY’s ECHOLALIA cassette.


For more insights from community leader Strategic Tape Reserve, be sure to follow them on Twitter. You can also indulge in the purchase of their ferric materials via their Bandcamp.

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